Today was awful.

As the subject implies, today was just awful. I thought that after all this time of watching Mr. Toddrick from afar I'd finally go to talk to him, and tell him about how I feel. Damn... I was stupid.

I went to his class after school, I walked in, feeling really nervous. He was there and asked me what was up, and if I was there for my grade. I said I was, that I really wanted to do good in his class, really wanted to pass. He told me I could if I just made up some of my work and took my remake tests.

I waited for a few more seconds before I finally said it.

I mean, I had been hearing rumors around that he was gay, and he seems pretty gay to me.

I asked him if he would give me an A if I gave him a blowjob. He blew me off like I wasn't being serious, but when I pressed him saying I was serious he just laughed it off. He said it was stupid, and that I was just a kid with a crush. He told me to get over it. He told me that I was too young for him. I'm not too young! I'm not a kid! I'm very mature... I just don't get it.

I knew this would happen! I hate my fucking life.